The Replacements

The Replacements

2000

Director: Howard Deutch

Writer: Vince McKewin

118 Minutes

In 1987, the National Football League used replacement players for weeks four, five, and six of the regular season. In week seven, veteran players crossed the line and the replacement players were let go once again. But for one night, they were heroes.

Shane Falco is a hero.

In the film The Replacements, Jimmy McGinty (Gene Hackman) is the coach of the Washington Sentinels. When his veteran players strike, McGinty hires replacement players lead by former Ohio State Quarterback Shane Falco (Keanu Reeves).

Simple. High concept. Fun.

But, there was heart to this film. There was meaning. It was a film for everyone that ever played sports and longed for their one-time shot to play again. It was a film for sports fans that wish their favorite players would play with heart instead of playing for their wallets. And it was a film for anyone who’s been apart of a great team that came to an end.

The film stars Reeves, Hackman, Orlando Jones, Jon Favreau, Rhys Lfans, and John Madden.

In the scene above, the replacement players are told the veteran players have crossed and tonight is their last night playing in the NFL. The team is down 14 to 17, with the ball, late in the forth quarter. And they have Shane Falco, who dressed during half time when their starting quarterback didn’t have enough heart.

Shane huddles the team up and says, “I know you’re tired. I know you’re hurting. I wish I could say something that was classy and inspirational, but that just wouldn’t be our style.”

He follows with this, “…Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory lasts forever.”

When you know it’s over, that’s all you need to hear. It means whatever you have left should be left on the field. There is no tomorrow. There is only tonight. And tonight, we can be heroes.

This is why we love films like The Replacement and Varsity Blues. These are films of heroics. They aren't advancing on a beachhead or flying in an A-10 warthog, but they are heroes because they stand up for what they believe in and leave it all on the field.

And when given a second chance, none of them wasted it.

In the time of salary caps, lockouts, and bonuses, we need films like these to remind us how great sports can be and how at the heart of each game, there are heroes. It's not about the money. It's not about cars, houses, and girls. It's about football. And Shane Falco let them know that.

Like I said, he is a hero.

McGinty says it best, “When the Washington Sentinels left the stadium that day, there was no tickertape parade, no endorsement deals for sneakers or soda pop or breakfast cereal. Just a locker to be cleaned out and a ride home to catch. But what they didn't know, was that their lives had been changed forever because they had been part of something great. And greatness, no matter how brief, stays with a man. Every athlete dreams of a second chance, these men lived it.”

In the end, glory lasts forever.

The Departed

The Departed

2006

Director: Martin Scorsese

Writer: William Monahan, Alan Mak, and Felix Chong

151 Minutes

In 1991, there was uproar in the film community about Martin Scorsese losing “Best Director” and “Best Picture” to Kevin Costner for Dances with Wolves. Scorsese admitted that Dances with Wolves was more academy appropriate, but he would continue to make films.

Fifteen years later, Scorsese took home his first Academy Award for “Best Director – The Departed.” He has had a great career full of blockbusters, presidential assignations, and a bit on Curb Your enthusiasm.

He never needed an Oscar, but it was well deserved.

The Departed is about the corruption within the Massachusetts State Police and organized crime in the city of Boston. The cast of characters includes DiCapiro, Damon, Nicholson, Wahlberg, Sheen, Baldwin, and the ever-so-sexy Vera Farminga. It was a remake from the 2002 film Infernal Affairs, which their rights were purchased for just under two million dollars.

The Departed went on to gross 289 million dollars worldwide, receiving four Oscars, and had a body count of 22 people.

Not bad, Mr. Scorsese.

In the scene above, Colin Sullivan (Matt Damon) shoots Barrigan (James Badge Dale) in the head after Barrigan shot both Brown (Anthony Anderson) and Billy (Leonardo DiCaprio). It’s shit show. It’s a blood bath. It’s what wins Oscars.

Everyone dies. Everyone should die. No one is good. Everyone is corrupt. Thus, everyone dies.

But the reason why this scene is important is because you know why everyone is killed. They all had reasons. Barrigan was working for Costello (Jack Nicholson), thus he shoots Billy. Brown walked into a murder scene that had an infinite amount of questions, thus Barrigan shoots him. Sullivan shoots Barrigan because if there are no witnesses, there would be only one story to tell.

And Billy was shot because we weren’t expecting it. BOOM. I mean, who shoots Leonardo DiCaprio in the face?

Martin Scorsese does.

But it was exciting. It was a fun. And it was an entertaining film. It was jammed packed with celebrities, brilliant writing, and great direction. This film came together perfectly, which is why it received not only the Academies approval, but the box office as well.

And Mr. Scorsese, it was a long fifteen years for one of the most celebrated directors in history to gain his prize. Bravo, sir.

In the end, I leave you with this:

“When you decide to be something, you can be it. That's what they don't tell you in the church. When I was your age they would say we can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?” – Frank Costello

It’s true. What’s the difference.?

Love Actually

Love Actually

2003

Director: Richard Curtis

Writer: Richard Curtis

123 Minutes

First-time director Richard Curtis loves love. He is famous for writing such films as Bridget Jones’s Diary, Notting Hill, and Four Weddings and a Funeral. For his next project, Curtis took long walks on his vacation in Bali and would come up with a new story everyday.

Those stories eventually became Love Actually.

Love Actually has an ensemble cast, including Colin Firth, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson, Keira Knightley, Hugh Grant, and Laura Linney, which their characters interact with each other revolving around the theme of love. You have forbidden love, erotic love, hopeless-romantic love, lost love, brotherly love, young love, etc.

Then Curtis added Christmas into the mix. It’s just…unfair.

Each of these characters has highs, lows, midpoints, low-points, and climatic scenes about love. But in the end, all they wanted for Christmas was you.

In the scene above, Sam (Thomas Sangster) has been in love with Joanna (Olivia Olson) for the entire film. It’s the reason he is not sad about his mother’s death. It’s the reason he learned to play drums. It’s the reason for living.

Though we haven’t met Joanna until this scene, we know she’s one in a million. When the lights dim on the Christmas pageant and the majority of characters are present in the audience, Joanna takes stage.

The opening to her song, which she sings a cappella, is breathtaking. The characters are stunned. The audience is stunned. But we now see why Sam loves his girl.

But it’s the song: All I Want For Christmas is You.

It’s the meaning of the film. It’s why we love this film. We all want to be with the ones we love at Christmas - whether it be friends, family, new lovers, old lovers, or someone you met that day as a naked body double on a film set.

Love and Christmas. Like I said, unfair.

In the end, there were so many moments in this film that you walk away saying, “…that was great.” It’s because Love Actually is a great film. You have Colin traveling to Wisconsin to find American girls. The Prime Minister kissing Natalie in front an entire audience. Mr. Bean. Billy Mack. Billy Bob. You have lovers learning languages. Candid shots of real people at Heathrow Airport. And you have a man standing in front of his love with nothing but written cards and false hope.

But there is love. In life, that might be all you need. And at Christmas, that’s all you want.

Fight Club

Fight Club

1999

Director: David Fincher

Screenplay: Jim Uhls

139 Minutes

Fight Club is a philosophical film. It holds wisdom far beyond our grandparent’s reach and sets a standard for humanity’s actions against itself.

But, it all started with Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt).

For the quotes, wisdom, philosophy placed within the actions and dialog of this film, it came at a time when people needed an escape. We bought our happiness. We paid our dues. And we were ants marching on a log heading closer to our ultimate demise. Then this film came out:

“Welcome to Fight Club. The first rule of Fight Club is…”

And with it, Tyler changed lives. He inspired people to stand on the wall. And he gave meaning to hundreds of people that had no purpose. He was an alter-ago. He was a man’s man. And he was everything we wanted to be, then and now.

“All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not.”

In the scene above, Tyler is discussing materialistic goods with the Narrator (Edward Norton). Tyler mentions, “The things you own end up owning you.” This then leads to Narrator’s apartment exploding. This leads to moving in with Tyler. And that leads to Fight Club.

But every second of this film is Tyler. We follow the Narrator, but Tyler is our hero. And heroes get the best dialog:

“You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.”

And

“It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything.”

And

“Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Like the first monkey shot into space.”

And

“Self improvement is masturbation”

And finally:

“How much can you know yourself if you've never been in a fight?”

In the end, Fight Club is epic. It was an epic shooting schedule of 138 days with over 300 scenes shot on 200 locations. Director David Fincher, who is notorious for doing numerous takes, had Brad Pitt and Edward Nortan do 38 takes in Lou’s Bar after Narrator’s apartment blew up. And with a 71 million dollars budget, you get one of the greatest films in the history of cinema.

But the quote of the film, having no philosophical involvement, goes to Marla Singer (Helena Bonham Carter) during the pillow-talk scene.

The studio wanted to the original line “I want to have your abortion” cut, thus Fincher made a deal he would cut that line, but the replacement line couldn’t be cut.

Fox Studio’s agreed, thus Marla says, ‘I haven’t been fucking like since grade school.”

And she has Tyler to thank for it.

Coming to America

Coming to America

1988

Director: John Landis

Writers: David Sheffield and Barry Blaustein

116 Minutes

There is nothing better than Eddie Murphy walking around the streets of Queens singing Jackie Wilson's, “To Be Loved,” while the neighbors scream obscenities.

Or Eddie Murphy saying, “Good Morning, my neighbors,” while the neighbors scream obscenities. Or Eddie Murphy playing Saul, Randy Watson, Clarence screaming obscenities.

In short, this movie is Eddie Murphy. And we want him screaming obscenities.

Coming to America is about a young prince who rejects his chosen bride, ventures past his kingdom, and finds his Queen…in Queens, New York.

But there is heart to this familiar story. Prince Akeem wants a woman to love him for himself, not for money or fame. Thus, he disguises himself as an average person to find his queen. The elements from hundreds of great stories can be found laced within this romantic comedy.

And it’s brilliant.

In the scene above, Akeem works at a local fast-food restaurant called McDowell’s. When a hold-up man (Samuel L. Jackson) enters to rob the joint, everyone freezes. Everyone except Akeem. Slowly, Akeem loosens his mop handle, excuses himself, and approaches the hold-up man, and this is how it goes down:

It would be wise for you to put the weapon down.
Who the fuck is this asshole?
Please refrain from using any other obscenities in the presents of these people.
What?
I’ve warned you. I’ll be forced to thrash you.
Fuck you.

Akeem thrashes, trips him to the ground, while his friend and loyal subject Semmi (Arsenio Hall) grabs the shotgun and says, “Freeze! You disease rhinoceros’s pizzal.”

Akeem is a hero and only after jacking up Samuel L. Jackson does his Queen-to-Be notice him.

But this is why we go to movies. This is what movies used to be. They were fun. Fun dialog and obscenities. Fun thrashing. And two fun heroes.

In short, we want Eddie Murphy from the 1980’s.

Sadly, we are left with the Eddie Murphy in the 2000’s that brought us Norbit, Pluto Nash, and Doctor Dolittle. He got older. He had kids. And screaming obscenities doesn’t sell in the 2000’s like it did in the 1980’s.

But it should, GOD DAMMIT!

Coming to America is a film that should never be remade. It shouldn’t be studied in film classes, nor frowned upon by a rated-R rating.

It should be enjoyed. Eddie Murphy should be enjoyed. And bathing like the Prince of Zamunda should be enjoyed.

And while you're in the clapping mood, I'd like to introduce my band: Sexual Chocolate.

The Lion King

The Lion King

1994

Director: Roger Allers and Rob Minkoff

Writers: Irene Mechhi, Jonathan Roberts, Linda Woolverton, etc.

89 Minutes

The Lion King is one of Disney’s best. It holds rank with such films as Snow White, Streamboat Willy, and the Toy Story franchise. Even though it took over twenty-five writers (Disney’s consistently uses handfuls of writers to complete a film) to assemble the story and additional material, this film ranks as one of the best-animated films ever created.

And Hakuna Matata means no worries.

The Lion King is a story about a young prince named Simba. When his father is killed, Simba (Jonathan Taylor Thomas) leaves the pride lands and is considered dead by his friends and family. When his soul mate Nala (Moira Kelly) finds the adult Simba (Matthew Broderick) alive, she convinces him to return to the pride lands and take back his kingdom.

Simple, direct, and it was best selling home video of all time with 55 million copies sold to date.

In the scene above, Mufasa (James Earl Jones), Simba’s father, is killed trying to save his son. When Simba discovers his body, Mufasa’s brother Scar (Jeremy Irons) tells Simba that he is to blame for this accident. Scar tells him to run away, while he sends hyenas to kill the young cub.

Simba escapes the hyenas, but ventures into the unknown world – a world where you eat bugs.

This is a coming-of-age story and without Simba’s departure and prodigal son return, Simba couldn’t have come-of-age. He would have been dead or unchanged. Leaving your home, meeting his new friends, and growing into a man is what this film explains and explores.

Boyhood to manhood.

This is a common story. A heroes journey. Simba is not unlike any of us at a young age. He is bright, clever, and curious. He represents us. Once he grows up, he fights for what is right in the world. Like I said, he represents us.

The Lion King is an “us” film. We see ourselves in this story much like Simba sees his father in himself. That’s why we loved his film. It resonates deep within our subconscious and explains who we are in the world. We have been lost or scared after losing a parent. We have avoided our responsibility at one time. And we have fought for what's rightfully ours.

We have all been Simba. And right, wrong, good, bad, or indifferent, Simba was a hero.

And we are all heroes - right, wrong, good, bad or indifferent.

The Lion King spawned sequels, books, and a musical because it’s subject matter. It hit home with audiences. With a great soundtrack and outstanding visual effects, The Lion King deserved its 770 million dollar box office success, including a re-release 3D version currently out in theaters.

But it did take over twenty-five writers to tell this story.

Twenty-five.